I have lived in my apartment for over a year, but yet I am still unpacking. I was going through a box the other night and found my old yearbooks. I thought I'd share them here with you. (Scroll down slowly, so you don't ruin any surprises!)
Oh man. Remember this hair trend? Yikes! Also, I was high out of my mind (sorry, Mom!) And this was my senior photo! Mortifying...
Here's when I was in eighth grade. Look how young I am! Kids used to say I looked just like my father...
Wow, 11th grade! I had a really bad hickey on my neck for picture day (thanks a lot, Random Boy From Fresno!), which is why my collar is buttoned all the way up...
Aww! 9th grade! I was a little freaked out that day... first day of high school and all. My mom spent hours on my hair do that morning, and I fell asleep on the bus ride to school and mashed the back of it to hell. Oh well! It's still a really nice photo...
No laughing please! I'm actually really embarrassed about this last photo, which is from the 10th grade, when I was in my "Ted Danson" phase...
I hope you all enjoyed this indulgent walk down memory lane as much as I did!
*Thanks to Hartwick Hanson for showing me the website that made this possible. www.yearbookyourself.com. IF YOU USE THE SITE, PLEASE SEND ME YOUR BEST YEARBOOK PHOTO AND I WILL POST IT HERE!
Goodness me, I love the internet. I especially enjoy websites that cater to the desires of people with weird, expensive interests. One of these websites is the Gentleman's Emporium, which has a vast collection of ridiculous Victorian and Edwardian outfits for both genders. I like this website better than other costume websites because not only do they sell the pieces separately for ease of mixing and matching, but they bring the outfits to life with the name and title of the fictitious person who may have worn such a thing. PLUS- Backstories!
She's a widow! Her husband died in what the website refers to as "the great fire of three years ago." That was 2005, so I'm pretty sure they are referring to the big fires in Simi Valley. Also, she is fond of hats that look like a giant potpourri sachet exploded on her head.
His entire outfit costs over $500! It is also extremely flammable and may, at any moment be ignited by a bunsen burner! It's a good thing that, as the site mentions, he spends a lot of time giving lectures "at the esteemed Institute of Technology!" How the Victorians love being vague!
*Surviving "a bout of the ague!" *Surviving an "Indian attack!" *Surviving the birth of five children! *Surviving on a farm without her husband! *An actual quote by Ms. Sullivan about her arrival in town after surviving the long journey!
In his unbelievable hat, he builds dirigibles. Also, he doesn't believe in Bernoulli's principles. The website's creators were lucky enough to find a quote from the Baron on the subject. He said that the flights of heavier craft were "mere parlor tricks, no more interesting to the scientist than the ballistic flight of a well-shot cannonball." It should be noted that he hails from the fictional land of "Frohmann."
Althea! Why so glum? Your husband is the well known Dr. Calvin Parker! You have three boys! You started the public library, and were the school's superintendent! Chin up, Althea! Put on a more brightly colored snood and smile!!
*Special thanks to David Malloy, Burbank Gentleman, for finding this site!
I've noticed a trend in commercials for any food product geared toward woman. They always feature a woman indulging in their product, seriously and solitarily. Take Dove chocolate for example. In a typical commercial, a sun dress-clad woman can often be found sitting in a well-appointed bedroom or living room, alone, in a comfortable chair. After a few moments of looking smugly relaxed, she'll reach for a solitary piece of Dove chocolate and, eyes closed, bite a third of it off, a smile creeping across her lips.
Now, I'm not usually one to go for the "You ladies know what I'm talking about" humor, but seriously. These commercials are crap, and YOU LADIES KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT. Have you ever had Dove chocolate? Or any chocolate for that matter? Of course you have. The only time it's ever eaten timidly and slowly is in the presence of royalty, or a new boyfriend. Otherwise, if you're a chick, having a relaxing day at home alone, you're in sweatpants, lying on the couch watching Iron Chef. It is inevitable that you will go for the chocolate, but there is no way that you slowly bite into a single piece. Hell no. You tear into an entire bag of chocolates and cram 'em in, nine at a time, until they're gone.
While writing this post, I was poking around YouTube to try and find an example of one of these commercials. All I could really find were a few ads from China. I've posted one on here that I find particularly weird. Let's discuss it, shall we?
First, there appears to be some suggestive material here. The young waiter sees the woman, clearly taken with her beauty. Then, seconds later, we see what can only be described as implied sexual imagery.
Gross!
The weirdest part, though, is when she bites into the candy, this strange, chocolaty satin monster appears out of nowhere, wrapping itself around her body, preventing her from breathing properly. It encases her, and then moves on to attack the poor young man.
Upon further analysis, however, I have deduced that this silken horror has actually been summoned by the girl to rid her relaxing day of the perverted waiter. Because, if you're going to have some quality "Me Time," the last thing you want is some guy watching you chow down on your chocolate.
If you're like me, you're going to enjoy the Olympics. But, if you're like the fine fellows at Funbox, you are REALLY going to enjoy the Olympics. Watch below...
